Recognizing Passive-Aggressive Behavior in Our Children

Ask any homeschooling mom what frustrates heroak island, close to Mom's elbow, sit three well
most and she will mention the kids taking foreverdressed, finely groomed, jolly children. The family
to finish their work, not doing their work orcollie barks playfully. The calico cat catches a
complaining about their work. There seems to besunbeam. A perky parakeet, trained to sing along
a theme here. If I burned 100 calories every timewith music, dances on her perch and chirps the
I heard such a complaint, I would be conductingmelody to Don't Worry, Be Happy.
weight-loss seminars.The seven-year old is parsing his Latin verbs, the
Suffering Alonenine-year old is reading War and Peace while
Most moms silently suffer, reluctant tocompleting tomorrow's calculus assignment, and
acknowledge defeat, until they meet with theirthe eleven-year old is writing his second novel.
facilitator. Facilitators talk to many moms; thus,Every few minutes, one slaps another on the
they are exposed to the bigger picture, butback and says, "Good job! You're doing so well!"
individual homeschoolers struggle alone, notAt their elder siblings' feet, sit two contented
realizing that this problem is typical. We dare nottoddlers constructing Meccano cities while reciting
ignore it, however, because typical or not, it'stheir timetables to song. Handel's Messiah plays
annoying!softly and melodically through the home's
Much more than annoying, it leads to panic whenintercom system. As the oven timer signals
we believe that we are unusual, which just isn'tremoval of the home baked beans, the ten-year
true. I guarantee you that this hassle is commonold calls gently and respectfully from the table
at one time or another to every homeschool (orwhere she is rocking the baby's cradle with one
for that matter to every home). It happened infoot while completing a chemistry experiment.
mine, and I bet it has happened in yours. In fact,"Mother, am I permitted to finish next week's
you might be struggling with your children'slessons today before I fold the laundry and chop
passive-aggressive behavior right now.wood? I am so eager to complete the textbook
Finding a Solutionby Christmas and begin my physics. I do not
The first step in finding a solution is to admit thewant to fall behind. Oh, and Mother...You look
problem. The second is to realize that you are notlovely. Have I thanked you today for
alone. The third is to get smart.homeschooling me?"
There are many dynamics at play here. First ofAcross the table, the eight-year old whistles
all, there's Mother's fear of failure. Most likely aAmazing Grace as he builds birdhouses to sell in
product of a North American school system, Momthe family business. All of the people in this picture
is performance oriented. She wants to succeedare smiling and reciting Psalm 119 simultaneously.
(boy, does she want to succeed!) and"That's great, children!" Mom sings out as they
homeschooling is her baby.complete verse 176. "Now let's try it in Japanese!"
Resistance from OthersCan we all agree that no homeschool looks
Someone is resisting her--a mother-in-law, aanything like this? Most of them look remarkably
husband, a neighbor, a girlfriend. She has blabbedlike yours, complete with the sticky countertops!
up the benefits and joys of this idea to herSo enough of the delusion already! We will never
skeptical friends and now things don't seem to beattain perfection.
panning out. The kids don't delight in school workThe Plan
(first shock) and they can't seem to get it done inWe need a plan. Let's start by lighting a candle
a day, at least not in time (maybe there's tooand a stick of incense, breathing deeply and doing
much work, the wrong curriculum, a poorthe following:
schedule). Although she's sold on homeschooling,Acknowledging the problem: Kids dawdle and balk.
she's afraid that maybe it's not for her. MaybeIt's normal. It's not evil, only childish. We're not
she's ruining her children. She feels chained to aalone. Repeat ten times: "My kids are normal and
sinking ship. More and more frequently, she findsso am I!"
herself longing for the return of her peacefulAdjusting our focus: Our homeschool doesn't have
pre-homeschooling life.to look like a cover spread for Homeschooling
The DelusionToday. Repeat ten times: "Our school is normal
The second dynamic is Mother's delusion. Mostand so is our house!"
homeschoolers' expectations are unreal. TheyTaking back control: Repeat twenty times: "I am
strive to grasp a phantom carrot, which not onlythe adult here."
can be reached, it doesn't exist! Their NormanNumber three can be a challenge, but it's actually
Rockwell painting of the perfect homeschool goeseasier than you think (and an awful lot of fun).
something like this:Have you ever asked yourself, "Why am I
Mom, looking well rested and dressed in a sharparguing with an eight-year old?" There really is no
outfit and starched apron is baking pies fromargument. You are the boss. Hold on to that
scratch in the large, open kitchen of the family'sthought until my next article when I will lay out a
log cabin. It's harvest time and she's eager togreat plan for you to take back control. That's
sample the new apple crop.the part where we get smart. For now, give
In one corner of the room, a cheerful fireyourself a break. You're normal, you're not going
radiates from the field stone fireplace. At the solidnuts, and there is hope.